I have a stomachache. I can't exactly say that this is the cause of the weird idea I just had, but it cannot be logically excluded.

I think I might just walk into the bar down the street, have a seat, pull a stuffed Snoopy out of my bag, and sit him on the bar next to me. "Set us up," I'll say, "two vodka gimlets." And then just sit there and write in my jottings notebook for an hour or two and ignore the hell out of anybody else in the place.

I loved my stuffed Snoopy. Mom still keeps him for me.

Monday

Grab both of her breasts completely in your hands and knead them like dough.
posted by Tony from CRANIAL EXPLOSIONS at 10:01 PM

Do It For the Experience
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Strangely enough. I did that this morning while she brushed her teeth.

"Like every good and retarded Dot Com company, they had a massively bloated and probably well paid staff that got their pink slips while they were still pissing champagne from the launch party."

been there. done that.

And.....yup. Still married.

Out Of The Mouth Of Tony

"I came to this bizarre realization: I am a husband. For example, think of your dad and then say to yourself, 'Jay is one of those....' Wow, isn't that fucked up?"

Spoken only like Tony can. Hilarious...hahahahahaha!

Do It For the Experience

Did I mention I'm getting married on monday?

No?

Well, I am.

For Gil and Harland:

Yesterday I noticed this huge crowd which trailed down the block. I was in a city bus on my way home. The crowd wound it's way around the corner, everyone was facing away from me. As the bus pulled closer I could see the line's ultimate destination.....

KFC.

It was toonie tuesday.

Honest, no lie.

Even if you ate pebbles, your shit wouldn't rock.