jay is 100% straight
jay is 42 degrees fahrenheit with a july temperature average of 80 degrees
jay is a big mountain; it may not have as many 'trails' as other places
jay is a common
jay is a common and conspicuous denizen of the west
jay is a complex and unique individual
jay is a dumbass
jay is a founder and chairman of the scientific advisory board of nanomed pharmaceuticals
jay is a great actor
jay is a great eight track recording package that is so easy to use
jay is a guy who knows how to use the modern to serve the past
jay is a heterosexual
jay is a horrific thing to happen to the hip
jay is a long
jay is a loud
jay is a native of lake mahopac
jay is a nerd
jay is a painter
jay is a renowned sleight
jay is a senior at our local high school
jay is a slave to fashion trends
jay is a symbol of the proper use of power
jay is a top
jay is a trial attorney with particular experience in patent litigation
jay is a very friendly guy
jay is a very pretty bird that doesn't seem to be particularly shy of people
jay is about of the size of the jackdaw
jay is also active in international oil and gas matters
jay is also casual
jay is also designing and carving two nine foot in diameter brick circles that flank the entrance
jay is also highly variable
jay is also invite as a monthly recident dj at on in off corso
jay is also is director of the five college tibetan studies in india program
jay is also ranked as a 6th dan in judo
jay is also the fiefdom of bill stenger
jay is an animated instructor who makes his classes fun and entertaining as well as educational
jay is batboy?
jay is between 9 and 12 inches long
jay is canadian
jay is caught
jay is clearly a techno by his appearance because he wears the techno "uniform" of black clothes
jay is coming to melbourne
jay is committed to keeping his knowledge of fitness training and nutrition current
jay is common in suburbs
jay is connected to the following things
jay is correct
jay is currently the resident lighting designer for the everyman theatre in baltimore and a freelance designer in the baltimore
jay is dead
jay is development coordinator with the northampton group
jay is found from east to west as far as north as the tree limit and south to where the northern evergreen forests end
jay is geboren
jay is generally protected by provincial legislation
jay is going to sytlandtaw
jay is gone
jay is gonna kill me for this but
jay is great
jay is happy to offer workshops on christian vocation and spirituality
jay is here now
jay is hiphop
jay is just the right combination of unquenchable curiosity and high
jay is like
jay is like stepping into another world
jay is more then just a sexy stud
jay is most likely to regress
jay is my favorite playground
jay is not
jay is not a mod here anymore
jay is not god
jay is now a second year university student and he's studying to be a pharmacist
jay is one heck of an actor
jay is one of the few men in the world to ever receive this award and is also the youngest person to ever be nominated and win
jay is one of the world's great sleight
jay is open about the poems being not even representative of the poets themselves
jay is our hero
jay is over 18
jay is probably not the greatest skater of all time
jay is recognized as one of the most adept manipulators of playing cards in the world
jay is relocating
jay is right
jay is second to none by bear on may
jay is similar in colour
jay is slowly but surely getting his strength back
jay is so ugly
jay is sooooooo cool
jay is stuck in an artistic straitjacket of his own making
jay is switching to will's decaf
jay is talking about
jay is terrible
jay is that he loves to tell stories
jay is the author of several articles on unix/linux security
jay is the best
jay is the best ever
jay is the coolest roadie in the world and now he has a fan club
jay is the culprit who is doing this mischief and is the root of harassment
jay is the founder of conscious action
jay is the man
jay is 'the master of disco scratch'
jay is the most colorful representative of its otherwise dull family in europe
jay is the most productive ally of the crime family
jay is trying not to paint himself into a corner
jay is ugly
jay is veering too deeply into the philosophical

"When from behind you, someone will utter the stupidest thing you've ever heard in your life, and your brain will come to a screeching halt. And the left-hand side of the brain will turn to the right-hand side and say, 'It's dark in here. And we may die.'"
- L. Black

"Reduce Unwanted Stress By Not Giving A Fuck."

Tony is melting.

No really, he is.

He's melting.

Good for him.

I have a stomachache. I can't exactly say that this is the cause of the weird idea I just had, but it cannot be logically excluded.

I think I might just walk into the bar down the street, have a seat, pull a stuffed Snoopy out of my bag, and sit him on the bar next to me. "Set us up," I'll say, "two vodka gimlets." And then just sit there and write in my jottings notebook for an hour or two and ignore the hell out of anybody else in the place.

I loved my stuffed Snoopy. Mom still keeps him for me.

Monday

Grab both of her breasts completely in your hands and knead them like dough.
posted by Tony from CRANIAL EXPLOSIONS at 10:01 PM

Do It For the Experience
----
Strangely enough. I did that this morning while she brushed her teeth.

"Like every good and retarded Dot Com company, they had a massively bloated and probably well paid staff that got their pink slips while they were still pissing champagne from the launch party."

been there. done that.

And.....yup. Still married.

Out Of The Mouth Of Tony

"I came to this bizarre realization: I am a husband. For example, think of your dad and then say to yourself, 'Jay is one of those....' Wow, isn't that fucked up?"

Spoken only like Tony can. Hilarious...hahahahahaha!

Do It For the Experience

Did I mention I'm getting married on monday?

No?

Well, I am.

For Gil and Harland:

Yesterday I noticed this huge crowd which trailed down the block. I was in a city bus on my way home. The crowd wound it's way around the corner, everyone was facing away from me. As the bus pulled closer I could see the line's ultimate destination.....

KFC.

It was toonie tuesday.

Honest, no lie.

Even if you ate pebbles, your shit wouldn't rock.

The same thing that made him a great frontman for Van Halen might make him a good radio personality.

Roth defines that quality as "belligerent enthusiasm."

"There a thin line between rage and really great art," he said. "As soon as people settle in and get relaxed, it's over.

"You've got to have fury. If you're gonna laugh, laugh to win. If you're not gonna laugh, let me see a war face."

Where did that rage come from?

"Maybe," Roth said with a laugh, "somebody didn't pay enough attention to me as a kid."



David Lee Roth tells Earth about album

Birds.

They chase me. They try to kill me. The number of "Birds Attack" stories that have happened to me are numerous to detail. But the short list:

-"Killer Mazur Budgie" rips open back of my neck while I'm in the fetal position screaming.

-Crazed Sparrow bullets straight for my head in the Granville underpass. I drop to the pavement in the nick of time.

-This Morning a Stalking Crow followed me for four blocks while dive bombing my head. Screaming taunts and curses at me.

Birds hate me. I'm scared of them. Why?

Cause they can fly and I can't. They have the upper hand.

They win.

"Eighties parties are nothing but a chance for incest survivors to bury their memories for a short joyous respite (as long as the Kajagoogoo keeps playing, it's still 1986 and I haven't been molested yet)."

From GIRLS ARE PRETTY

I dated a chick that this refers to. And upon reading this it all started to make sense. Remember her magic code my friends? FK ME DA DE.

Ken and I have started our own cartoon strip.

The two characters are Max and Spanky.

We improvise the dialog on MSN Chat and then I use the dialog as a search term on Google image search and put together the strip.

The logo I designed from scratch and I'm quite proud of it.

Brain Frog - It's a brain in your frog.

Tomorrow I buy a wedding ring.

Huh.

Weird.

So this quadriplegic is waving his piss filled catheter bag at me.

What can I say?

"No thanks. Not thirsty."

Moved into a new space at work. Used to have my own cube. Now share a space with 3 other people. Really fucking sucks.

Went from a veal pen to a pig pen.

Welcome to the modern day high tech sweat shop.

The paraphrase I heard and will remember:

"Art is best when it forgets its name."

The actual quote:

"Art does not come and lie in the beds we make for it. It slips away as soon as its name is uttered: it likes to preserve its incognito. Its best moments are when it forgets its very name."
-- Jean Dubuffet